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Messages - momfellinglost

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General Discussion / Re: Children of a parent with mental illness
« on: April 05, 2015, 01:21:03 AM »
I have read an started to reply to your post many times only to stop. I was trying to find the right words for what I wanted to say. I too grew up with a parent with a mental illness along with a sibling. For me it was awful. Not because they were awful but because they were untreated, that can change how a parent does the job of raising children. Those who work to deal with their illness makes a difference. It can teach them that trying to deal with even if we aren't good at it counts. It teaches them tolerance, along with compassion for those who chose not to deal with it. As well as how to treat others no matter what the problem is. So I think you have given your children tools that many don't get from their parents. We aren't perfect but then who is.  It didn't change the fact that I loved my parent but that given the age and the time they grew up made it impossible for them to admit they had a problem that could be helped by a doctor. One got treatment and changed the relationship with their children for the better it helped to heal the wounds that were there before. Words can hurt and they can heal but the need for words is forever and until they have children they don't understand the love and the guilt that parents often have no matter if they have a mental illness or not. your post is a reminder to keep the lines of talk open no matter how old they are.

General Discussion / Re: I am freaking out
« on: March 05, 2015, 10:39:46 PM »
Since most bulbs are put in at the same time and new type bulbs have a defined life span it would make sense that more than one would go out at the same time

General Discussion / Re: what is normal
« on: March 04, 2015, 08:26:42 PM »
I am sure if ask most people what normal means bet they couldn't tell you. When you ask them what crazy is bet they have definate ideas of what that is. I have know so called normal people that i can only describe as ,and excuse the wording batsh*t crazy. And those who are crazy and more normal than most. They say there is a fine line between genius and insanity. So if we are crazy we are in some real good company. They are a lot of real smart caring kind people on this site who are called crazy and can teach the world a thing or two about how to treat people.

I think he is. Letting you know that he will be there always. We know very little about the afterlife. My son used to talk about the man who came and sat with him when he was little. Too little to talk point a picture of his grandfather who passed away 9 months before hewas born. He told stories that he had no way of knowing.

 Even if that light seems so far away. I know I have talked about the problems my son has been having with his kids. Well things have moved forward and he is seeing them despite a person who has been working actively behind the scenes to not allow this to happen. I have been working with him in getting his place together so that they can come there to see him. His marriage unfortunately has been lost and appears that it will not be repaired. Once again to other people using things that should never be used. I do have a problem with them letting someone who has such anger against him and because I am his mother me as well(even though this person doesn't even know me) then lying about it being ok with those who are in charge. But we will let this go for now. They are on notice that we know about it and won't allow it to happen. But the one thing that is clear is that his kids love him miss him and want to be with him and they know that as well.
 The other happy but sad new is that we are having a new grand child in the new year. My youngest and his wife are expecting. This is happy news but being more than a thousand miles away when you don't have a lot of money to fly there makes it sad cause i don't know when we be able to go and see the new baby. Flights are more than 1500 for two of us and because of my hubby s allergies to cats means we also have to rent a hotel room will make it so hard to afford it. But I will keep hoping that we can some how find the money to get there.  I never thought my kids would be so far away from home it has been almost 3 years since we have seen him, and I miss him so much it hurts. I seem to cry just thinking about him being so far with no one other than his in laws to talk to. I know they are good people and they love him but it must be so hard on him as well. I can tell by some of the things his says that he is missing us.
 Sometimes it feels like life is so unfair and just plain mean to people. here is hoping that the next year will be so much better.

General Discussion / Re: Seasons Greetings
« on: December 21, 2014, 11:00:37 AM »
The same to you and everyone else. This time of year can be so hard on so many people for so many reasons. I hope that everyone has a nice time. And for those who need to vent don't forget it can be very helpful to do so some where that you feel safe(like here) don't let the feelings build up. Take care give a hug to someone you love.

General Discussion / Re: Introduction
« on: December 14, 2014, 10:05:59 AM »
First let me say sorry for being so late in welcoming you to the board. I think you will find a great bunch of helpful, knowledgeable, and non judgemental people that there ever is any where. Many so called "normal" people could learn al ot from this group of people in how to treat others. Not that the people here are perfect they aren't but they do have so many great quality's that I wish others had. I hope you make your self at home and feel that you can spend so time with others here. They know so much or they know who can help you find what they aren't sure of. Hope you enjoy the board and all the info that is on this site and I would encourage you to check out the whole site with all the info that it has.

I had a thought well more than one. But if you aren't familiar with CPP and how it works a lot of people who apply get turned down the first time. The percentage is fairly high. so don't take the first no as the only answer and appeal there no should you get turned down.

General Discussion / Re: Welcome Neither Here Nor There
« on: October 16, 2014, 11:20:24 PM »
Sorry to be so late in saying welcome to the site hope you will find it helpful and maybe at times make you smile. I alway tell new people that the posters here could teach others a thing or two about how to treat others. Not that we are perfect but they are a great bunch with a lot of knowledge and support for others with out judgement.

General Discussion / Re: Thanksgiving is not always fun
« on: October 16, 2014, 11:17:38 PM »
I am sorry that their behaviour caused you so much stress. I have always found that people who do these kinds of things never see just how they look to others. I don't drink either and have never objected to others who do but at the same time I have never liked to see the sloppy kind of drunks. I wish I could offer some words of wisdom but I don't have any other than to say I understand how you feel. I normally think of this kind of thing(drunkeness) as a past time for young people who are trying out their choices and mostly stops when kids come along.

General Discussion / Re: Ice bucket challenge.
« on: September 07, 2014, 07:33:19 AM »
 It is a good cause and I had hoped that it would bring to the fore front that many illness aren't being researched. They used to call them orphans cause no one cared about them. They aren't sexy or popular and if there aren't enough people with them they don't  make money. Drug companies won't spend with out return no matter who much people ask. But it does seem that it has become a easy to post a video and while many do donate to the cause I am willing to bet many only go as far as the video.

General Discussion / Re: A rant and a laugh
« on: September 07, 2014, 07:22:54 AM »
For some people that I know who got married and shouldn't have that is very true. Thanks Paul I will have to file that in my use when you lest expect it file.

General Discussion / Re: Donations to charities
« on: September 07, 2014, 07:17:51 AM »
You do need to  check out who you are giving to. There are two kind of charities not for profit (they can't give tax receipts) and the kind that can. Often times it is the tax rules that are very strict in how a charity operates. Their tax returns are open for public eyes. Just because some group says they are not for profit doesn't make it so. Giving can change a life be that human or animal and there are ways to give without one cent leaving your pocket. Give your time, give a good. This year I added to my large garden one row of every veg that I grow for a local soup kitchen. They were very happy to take my produce (which I always seem to have too much of at some point) I got a tax receipt for my effort(something that I would have done any way) and those who needed a hot meal got the benifit of my organic veg. I don't have a lot of extra money but I could give a little time in my garden to help to someone else. There are community gardens who are always looking for help in the harvest of veg for food banks and soup kitchens as well.
 I give my time and a little gas money to a not for profit that transports rescue dogs of a certain breed (there are many of them) they don't pay anyone and every dime goes to the animals for their up keep vet cost, food etc. I check out every place I give to make sure they are the kind of place that I want to say I support.
 For some people it is easier to give money and think of the tax break they are getting and there are places who have lost their way in spending. There are places that are set up to fool people into thinking they are doing good work when they aren't but they aren't the norm nor do they stay under the radar for long Revenue Canada finds them and takes away the very thing that they use to lure people the tax exemption. Yes we must be vigilant in who we give to but must also be careful not to paint all charities with the same brush.

It is always sad when some one makes the choice he did (no matter the reason). My wish is that those who make this choice don't see is that they leave behind those who will forever wonder if they could have done more. It may not be true but they do it along with the grief and pain my hope for his family is that they can support each other. It must be so hard to go through you pain in such a public way with so many people giving opinions about your loved one. I hope that it can help one family get the support they arent' getting now.

General Discussion / Re: I"m back
« on: August 16, 2014, 12:23:20 PM »
Glad to see you back on here. I have to say i am missing alot of the other posters hope they will take the time to register and come back

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