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Topics - HSG

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General Discussion / Hi again, quarantine check-in and good wishes
« on: May 13, 2020, 10:08:28 pm »
Wow, my posting really dropped off a cliff on this forum, I don't know if that is a good or bad thing... job role changed, and all of a sudden its been 6 years.

I sincerely hope that everyone is doing well, or as well as can be expected given the circumstances. Been lots of growth for me over this time, I have been able to climb out of the deep depression I was in when I first joined this forum, with lots of help from multiple sources. I think one of the best things I've done is to learn from CBT about how my internal thoughts are generally tuned towards being pessimistic, and that even if I have a worst-case-disaster scenario generator constantly going off in my head, that I don't necessarily always need to listen to that voice, and that I can potentially listen to the optimistic voice too, and in reality the outcome will be somewhere between those two extremes. 

Not to say that life has been all sunshine and roses - I am a little worried that my pessimism has rubbed off on my kids somewhat, or at least my oldest, who struggles with emotional regulation (and has done so for some time). Been trying to work on helping him manage his emotions, but its been tough to do with both parents working and kids sort of left to watch TV or "do work" on laptops (which ends up being playing video games they find)... but trying not to beat myself up too much about that, there's really only so much that I can handle right now, and not a lot of time to beat myself up about things.

And trying to avoid the news whenever possible, as the president down south reminds me of the worst tendencies of my somewhat narcissistic father, and / or some of my previous bosses, which is a bit of a trigger for my own emotions. Definitely learning how to manage stress has been a big component to surviving this whole lockdown situation.

In any case, I am sending my best wishes to all of you, and can't promise I will necessarily be able to post regularly again, as I'm already like behind on 30 other things - but I do appreciate the previous friendships made on this forum, and hope that all of you are doing well.

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General Discussion / Robin Williams, and mood disorders in the news...
« on: August 14, 2014, 03:24:10 pm »
So I can't help but get a little bummed out about the suicide of Robin Wililams, to the point of it hurting a bit when I read articles about it.  Sounds like some of the details may still be shifting slightly, his wife mentioned he was sober, but in the early stages of Parkinsons Disease, but still the fact that he was depressed (and seemed at least to a casual observer to also entertain "mania", at least interms of his on stage persona), makes it hit somewhat close to home.

Perhaps a bit of good to come out of all this is at least it gets people talking about depression - I posted on facebook just to say to reach out to people in our lives who may be in need, because you never know when a small gesture may make a big difference to someone struggling with depression.

This article was also interesting, around whether creative types may be prone to bipolar, or whether its just a random association.  I don't know, for me the jury's still out - what I can say is that, at least in my work life, I know of more-creative and less-creative types, and generally the more-creative types (myself in that group, if I put modesty aside) tend to struggle more with moods than the less-creative ones.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2014/08/13/robin-williams-is-there-a-link-between-genius-and-mental-illness/14016255/

interested to hear other's opinions...

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General Discussion / high stress, lack of sleep, and hypomania...
« on: August 02, 2014, 09:57:21 pm »
Hi everyone,

Well, welcome to the new forum I guess ;)

I have just come off a very stressful week, I ended up not sleeping a lot due to multiple demands on my time, work- and home-related, which I think, combined with the stress, pushed me into a hypomanic mode.  I've been handling it more or less OK, have tried not to stress myself out about anything outside of my control. Its been wearing on me, I get busy with things and neglect sleep, which feeds the cycle.  Luckily its been a more productive version of hypomania, in that I have been getting stuff done, as opposed to other times when my hypomania would spin into disorganized chaos and / or angry unproductive hypomania.  But still, I'm very cautious and wary as I know how things can so easily spin out of control as they did the first time I experienced this.  I have actually been seeing someone at a mindfulness based cognitive therapy clinic, and parts of that discussion has helped, particularly with respect to just meditation and learning to calm my mind by daily practice of meditation - I can at least calm my mind down now when its racing around.

Anyhow, I don't have much specific to say outside of this is where I am at right now.  I have been needing to schedule an appointment with my family doctor so I may bring this up with her, as part of it is triggering physical symptoms / discomfort, and also to see if she thinks I need to see anyone.  But for now I've also resumed taking a bit of seroquel in the evenings as that had a good effect in calming me down (or at least getting me to sleep) when I had my previous episodes.

I hope that everyone else is more or less doing OK.  Please don't worry about me, I am pretty self-aware and know that I need to see someone about it, I have the MBCT clinic appointment next week and am going to get in to see my doctor too as soon as I can schedule something.

BEst wishes all,
HSG

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