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Topics - JennyRN70

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General Discussion / Work life remains a hot mess
« on: April 21, 2015, 06:15:03 pm »
HI everyone - well for those of you you know me you know that I am a nurse and I have struggled with this career - but let's not fool anyone - since I started my first job as a teenager I have never really been able to keep myself employed for a long period of time - the longest period being in my 20's for almost 4 years - I am so sad and frustrated because I did find a great position that was low stress and monday to friday that paid fairly well and I got laid off 2 months in - not for anything I did but because of lack of work...anyway as I sit now I tried to go to work as a contract nurse in the ER on Saturday and had a full blown panic attack while I was there - so it looks like I can't even do it once in a while - my days as an ER nurse are over - which is fine - I just want something that is low stress and no shifts - office job with data entry or something like that - so that is where I am these days - oh and not likely eligible for ODSP as my spouse makes 6 figures but pays his ex wife almost 3/4 of it :(

General Discussion / Holidays and Grief, Stress or other?
« on: December 12, 2014, 05:09:55 pm »
So it is that time of year again where we get the holidays stuffed down our throat - for many years now I have not been one to get excited/happy about this time of year - I lost my Nanny on December 21st in 1997 and have really never been the same since - I find it interesting that apparently over the month of December you are supposed to pretend that everything is okay - when often it it far from it - I can remember being suicidal 8 years ago Christmas eve - thankfully I am not ill like that anymore so I can deal with the holidays and I have a strong belief in God which is starting to help - it's hard as an only child though not to want that pile of presents I used to get when I was young (my Mom would often be manic and go Christmas shopping for me).  Anyway today I was shopping for baking ingredients and could almost feel my Nanny with me - it was nice - but I feel her more when I am at the cottage in the summer time.  Thanks for reading and I hope the rest of you can get through this time of year with minimal upset - and maybe even some happiness and fun.


General Discussion / mania/depression, money and how would you feel?
« on: November 10, 2014, 05:34:41 pm »
So as many of you know I have been off work for over 6 months with no financial input - my fiancé had been working ridiculous hours to keep us going and I found my spending really hasn't stopped - spending to feel better and spending when I feel good - so my fiancé has asked me to go to the bank and stop my access to the checking account and just have the savings account and he would put a limited amount of money there for gas and groceries and other things I might need I can ask him - he is very good about giving me money and has been paying for all of my courses - but I kind of feel like I am being treated like a child as I can seem to manage my money like an adult - anyway just wondered what you all thought about this - it feels like I am giving my freedom away somehow.

General Discussion / Community Dinner at my church
« on: October 06, 2014, 07:16:37 pm »
Hi everyone - just wanted to let you know about a yummy turkey dinner at my church Saturday night at 6:30pm - here is the link to the church - the food will be good because my future brother in law does most of the cooking! :) - our church is LGBT supportive and very welcoming - I know it is hard for many of us to go out into public places - this is going to be difficult for me too because I don't go to church too often but I plan on going (hubby is working) and if you are interested in going please let me know I could maybe arrange to pick you up if you are in the east end of the city xoxo


General Discussion / W5 tonight "suicide watch"
« on: October 04, 2014, 07:29:35 pm »
people who have killed themselves when in hospital :(

General Discussion / Latuda starting tomorrow
« on: September 24, 2014, 12:02:23 pm »
So Pdoc decided to go with this rather than the abilify - I start tomorrow - there is no tapering off effexor as of yet - Pdoc doesn't want me going through too much - so we will see.


General Discussion / romantic relationships and the effect of mental illness
« on: September 19, 2014, 03:11:58 pm »
Hi everyone - I am going through quite a bit right now - getting ready for a big med change and having to cancel our wedding due to stress - although my fiancé has indicated that he cannot continue with only him working - and it's highly unlikely I will be eligible for ODSP due to assets and his income.  I never see him because he is always working overtime - and not exaggerating - he leaves at 5 am - and I will be lucky if he is home by 9pm - it's usually midnight.  Just wondering who else has lost relationships because of their illness and the lack of partners being able to cope with the various issues.


General Discussion / Lamictal and Abilify for Bipolar 2?
« on: September 06, 2014, 05:15:21 pm »
Just wondering if anyone is on this combo - thinking I may ask for this from the Pdoc when I see him on the 24th - ughhh so not looking forward to all of this changing of meds!

General Discussion / Med change after 12 years
« on: August 27, 2014, 12:05:44 pm »
Hi everyone - I am a long time member on here but I have not posted in a very long time - Paul M would remember me :)  Anyway, my Pdoc and I have decided to ween me off Effexor and Valproic Acid as I am having major tremors from the Valproate and my understanding is the latest research states antidepressants are not good for bipolar disorder.  Pdoc has suggested Abilify - so I am obviously anxious about this as the Effexor is hell to come off of and then starting something new doesn't exactly excite me either.  Anyway just wondered if anyone else has any experience with this similar situation.  It scares me tons  :'(

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