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Messages - momfellinglost

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General Discussion / Re: Need advice
« on: May 04, 2016, 10:52:04 am »
I know you wrote this sometime ago and I hope things have improved for you. If you have a cell phone I would record some of the things he is doing. It may not stop it but it could help you later when dealing with other things. I would think that if he keeps it up it could be seen as what it is abuse and he could be removed from the home for such actions. I know you have a hard time dealing with him and wish that I had better suggestions on how to stop it but if it gets bad call the police with your medical they may do something but at the very lest it will put him on notice that you are not going to put up with it

General Discussion / Re: has any one else heard about a shortage
« on: May 04, 2016, 10:43:52 am »
Thanks for the answer Paul. I may have gotten the drug name wrong and I am going to check. Thanks

General Discussion / has any one else heard about a shortage
« on: April 22, 2016, 12:14:51 pm »
 My son who takes a large dose of serquil(sorry I know it isn't spelled right) and that he will need to change his meds. He is worried as it has always worked well for him. He is also worried about the switch and how it may effect his well being. Any one who can give me some tips and things to watch for. his family doc it great and easy to get into to see if he has problems but like all things sometimes the people who are effected are often the last to see how their meds are working or not. Thanks

General Discussion / Re: Hugs and Extra Support Needed
« on: January 25, 2016, 01:38:24 pm »
I am sorry that he is acting like this. Sending you extra big hugs. People can be so cruel to each other when splitting up. My brother and his wife split a couple of years ago and he is living with me due to money issues. He found out that she pawned his wedding ring from his first spouse who has passed away. The ring was to go to their son. He is very upset. She has also tried to get him arrested for stealing things by lying about stuff. He is so afraid of her that if he sees her he will turn his car around and go the other way due to her being willing to say anything to get her way. . I didn't mean to highjack your post but it helps to know other people are just as bad, some how it makes me feel better that my family isn't the only one with these kinds of things I hope you can find a lawyer soon and be able to move forward

General Discussion / Re: information for children in school too soon
« on: November 13, 2015, 12:55:03 pm »
I would agree if I wasn't seeing news articles of twelve year olds getting pregnant. Too often parents think their kids as so innocent about things and they know more than the parents do far too early. It is the world we live in today. There is new paper article about the codes kids use when texting so there parents have no idea what they are taking about to each other. You think they are talking about going to the mall and they are setting up a date for sex it is really scarey for parents these days

General Discussion / Re: Moving Date
« on: November 13, 2015, 12:51:50 pm »
So sorry you aren't getting the family support that you need wish I was closer to you I would step up and be willing to take you shopping. Wishing you all the best. When my son was looking for a lawyer he had the same problem sending emails and getting no response. It did take some phone calls. I don't  now your financial situation but even if you don't qualify for full legal aid they will sometimes front the money and you pay them back after the case is settled I know they take applications by phone as well as on line. It can limit your choices of a lawyer how ever. Something to think about

General Discussion / Re: Probate Fees and Estate Taxation
« on: November 06, 2015, 10:45:49 pm »
 So glad you have some names but don't be afraid to check out more than one lawyer you need one that is a good fit for you. He knows what things will set off your OCD so take anything he says with a grain of salt. I don't know your financial situation so the dollar amount he is quoting you is more than likely something he pulled out of a hat unless he has been to a lawyer or something he is just hoping for. The age of your youngest will be a factor but there are way to many things to consider before any number could be reached and however that ends up no one has the right to ask for the money up front. You would need to have a lot of documents and both sides have to disclose all of their stuff so try not to let it bother you too much and at this stage it isn't whats his is his and what yours is yours you are married so all assets and all debts are looked at. Just take your time you didn't get here in a month it took years and it will take a while to come to an agreement. Most likely neither party will be completely happy with the outcome.

General Discussion / Re: Moving Date
« on: November 02, 2015, 10:56:33 am »
Paul is right he can't force you out of the house if you don't have a lawyer you need one I know you don't have a lot of money and legal aid has services that they can offer. I know you have the house but that isn't a liquid asset I would do nothing without a legal agreement. Done by or approved by a lawyer or court. If you have someone who can be your advocate to make sure you aren't pushed around it would be good maybe they could even go to the lawyer with you so you don't forget or worry that what you are asking is not important everything is important. You have been together a long time and that will come into the mix. Lawyers know what to look for and what to focus on. No movng date with out an agreement. A woman shelter may have a list of lawyers who could be a good fit for you.

General Discussion / Re: Probate Fees and Estate Taxation
« on: November 02, 2015, 10:49:51 am »
I would write all the things down for when you see the lawyer so you don't miss any. I know that a house held in common with anyone is not taxed. If you are separated your will that you have now is not valid (if you are living separate and apart). The laws have had some changes recently things like filing income tax etc. There are rules around rsp and such if you have a designet for the rsp it will be treated different than if you do. You can write a will out by hand and have it be legal but it must be in your own hand nothing written on the computer will work unless it is witnessed. But be aware these wills are the most contested and found wanting so not followed. So going to a lawyer is the best way forward if you have any concerns that someone will cause problems then a lawyer will be the best one to deal with those things. I have seen first hand what can happen when a will isn't properly done and what can happen when people don't bother doing one just assuming people will do the right thing. Death brings out the worst in some. And even when there is a will if the estate isn't big enough the cost of a lawyer which the person who is contesting it has to pay for now can be too high. I know there are estates that are still in the courts for 10 years because the person left in charge can't handle it but courts are normally not willing to go against your wishes.  They have also changed for taxing purposes regarding things like jewelry if it is valued over a certain amount. If you also give things that have been in the family for years I would make a note of it somewhere so that one person doesn't get the you took it.  I would also remember your husband won't win everything he has to split it with you. Just listen to your lawyer and you need one don't sign anything he gives you without a lawyer seeing it.  Sometimes people think that if they can get someone to sign it before a lawyer sees it they can rely on it they can't and you really don't know if he has seen one. After all these years it isn't his and yours so he can't claim his assets are his beause they are in his name and wanting things like the dishes are ment to hurt you because he knows it will try not to let him do that to you.

General Discussion / Re: Family Law - Separation
« on: October 23, 2015, 10:44:55 am »
You might want to ask a any lawyer if they have any experience dealing with someone with a mental illness. They will need to understand your special needs. You own your disability certificate and he can only use it as your spouse once and if you don't need it to reduce your taxes to zero and only with your permission. Once your separate he won't be allowed to use it so his taxable income will go up.  It would appear from what you wrote you didn't know that. It belongs to you and if he is looking after filing income taxes has been transferring it there is nothing wrong with that when you are a family but that will end.

General Discussion / Re: Need to talk and question
« on: October 23, 2015, 10:31:49 am »
You need a lawyer the rules for support are often only applied if it goes to court and they have a lot of factors to consider it is never as easy as they make it sound. Couples can make their own deal with lawyers but talk to one before you do anything and make sure you give him/her any offers he has already tried to get you to sign. But don't sign anything with out talking to a lawyer it can be done with out going into court. He may have already talked to one and know he won't come out the way he wants so is trying to get you to agree with something else.  You could also check out a few independent websites that people rate lawyers. Ask around and check the local womans shelter they may have some names

General Discussion / Re: I want revenge
« on: October 23, 2015, 10:27:16 am »
I too know how you feel. But remember your grandkids will thank you many years from now for doing the right thing for them. You can just tell your self that it is for them that you bite your lip and say nothing nasty. It might help if you write her a letter that you won't mail or give to her. It can get out all the feelings you are holding in. It might not be a good a feeling as you think it would to say it to her. But if you were to say something where your grandkids are imagine their faces when grandma does it. And in the end you won't feel good about it. I know you won't do it but sometimes it can feel that you might feel better if you do but you won't. Deep breaths and keep saying it is for my grandkids that I behave and I am nice person.

General Discussion / Re: very upset by my granddaughter yelling at me
« on: October 23, 2015, 10:11:15 am »
 My son is going through something similar. This is the advise I gave him. The kids love both families and no matter what they say they love you. You have to make your home a safe place. Not a place to do what ever or say what ever they want. Disipline is a part of home. When my sons father and I separated years ago I made the policy that no one would be allowed to say anything neg about him. Not because he was a great person but because he was my childs other parent and my child neither choose his parent nor chose for us to divorce. If he ended up being a jerk my son would figure that out on his own but he wouldn't hear it from me.
 They will test you and your son to see if you still love them and if you are going to go away. You don't know what kinds of things they are hearing at their other home and may be having a hard time expressing themselves to either you or your son. Things are changing and I am sure they are scared and angry. Not sure how old they are but your son may need to ask that the kids have some help either alone or with both parents involved. It will get better but it may get worse before it does. Try and create the rules for the house and maybe have a talk with her about how it makes you feel. Make sure you tell her that you love her and that will not change but in the house we don't talk to each other like that.

General Discussion / Re: a few laughs(maybe)
« on: June 24, 2015, 02:33:48 pm »
Oh Paul I wish I had your wit but I will think upon this and see what I can come up with love this post hope there are lots of replies it made me smile

General Discussion / Re: Toronto Contingent
« on: June 24, 2015, 02:31:51 pm »
I am not sure who is in Toronto but there are quite a few in the surrounding area. I am not any where near there but I hope you will post here often sometimes the board is very active and others kind of quite but people drop in and post often. Welcome

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