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General Discussion / Re: Marriage problems
« on: February 04, 2015, 05:39:16 am »
Thank you Paul, LuckyLou and Peace. I appreciate your advice, support and caring. The way I write this may be a little mixed up.
I spoke to my son last night. He says that his wife truly wants to go ahead with the separation. They have been unhappy together for a long time.
I spoke to my caseworker yesterday. She says that he should check out the Employee Assistance Program first. Advice from them. His best course of action as what to do. Of course based on what both of them wants. My caseworker has been through a separation. My son says he will go through the separation procedure with his wife. Applying, etc.
His wife says she will not expect alimony from him. She wants him to have some kind of a life too. There may be some guilt on her part for having her affair. She says that my son is a very good father. She will expect child support from him. My son knows that he has to support the kids. He will do so.
Again I have to say that my son and his wife both love their children very much. I know that my son is not an easy customer to live with. He is moody and stubborn (like me). My husband and I had a very tough time with him when he was a teenager. Deep down he does have a kind heart. My son realizes that what has been going on in the marriage has not been all her fault. I have sided with his wife when how he acted or what he said to her was not right. I guess that they are not on the same page anymore.
His wife has a very big heart. She would help anyone out in a heart beat. She is very loyal to her friends. I admire her for taking her friends kids camping, babysitting them and being kind and loving to them. The parents of these kids don't do much with them.
I realize I have to put my anger aside especially for the sake of the children. They have to be protected first and foremost. Yes, I can see that of course her mother is going to side with her daughter as I am doing with my son.
My daughter-in-law's parents are good people. They love the grandkids too. We have camped with her parents quite a few times. They have been very pleasant to me and my daughters and my husband when he was alive. Actually we introduced them to camping and they love it.
My daughter in law's mother has already suggested that we might want to take the grandkids on a holiday. Of course, my son would come too.
That shows that there will most likely not be a problem about seeing the kids.
My son asked me if he could move in with me for a short while after the house has been sold, etc. and he can make plans as to where to live. I told him I already thought of that and it would be fine. He was very relieved by that. My caseworker says it may not be a bad think since I get lonely being on my own.
I will not speak ill of his wife in front of the children. One of the grandkids said something negative about his mommy. My son said that that was not nice. I agree.
Again I could go on and on. I believe things will fall into place.
Some of you are probably wondering why I am writing at this time of the night. You would think that it is because of the whole situation. That is not true. A little maybe but I have been having a health problem which keeps me awake. I usually catch up on my sleep later.
Again thank you everyone for being so caring. That is what I really love about this forum. You are my friends.
P.S. A big one I have to work on is being less judgemental of people.
Dragonfly
I spoke to my son last night. He says that his wife truly wants to go ahead with the separation. They have been unhappy together for a long time.
I spoke to my caseworker yesterday. She says that he should check out the Employee Assistance Program first. Advice from them. His best course of action as what to do. Of course based on what both of them wants. My caseworker has been through a separation. My son says he will go through the separation procedure with his wife. Applying, etc.
His wife says she will not expect alimony from him. She wants him to have some kind of a life too. There may be some guilt on her part for having her affair. She says that my son is a very good father. She will expect child support from him. My son knows that he has to support the kids. He will do so.
Again I have to say that my son and his wife both love their children very much. I know that my son is not an easy customer to live with. He is moody and stubborn (like me). My husband and I had a very tough time with him when he was a teenager. Deep down he does have a kind heart. My son realizes that what has been going on in the marriage has not been all her fault. I have sided with his wife when how he acted or what he said to her was not right. I guess that they are not on the same page anymore.
His wife has a very big heart. She would help anyone out in a heart beat. She is very loyal to her friends. I admire her for taking her friends kids camping, babysitting them and being kind and loving to them. The parents of these kids don't do much with them.
I realize I have to put my anger aside especially for the sake of the children. They have to be protected first and foremost. Yes, I can see that of course her mother is going to side with her daughter as I am doing with my son.
My daughter-in-law's parents are good people. They love the grandkids too. We have camped with her parents quite a few times. They have been very pleasant to me and my daughters and my husband when he was alive. Actually we introduced them to camping and they love it.
My daughter in law's mother has already suggested that we might want to take the grandkids on a holiday. Of course, my son would come too.
That shows that there will most likely not be a problem about seeing the kids.
My son asked me if he could move in with me for a short while after the house has been sold, etc. and he can make plans as to where to live. I told him I already thought of that and it would be fine. He was very relieved by that. My caseworker says it may not be a bad think since I get lonely being on my own.
I will not speak ill of his wife in front of the children. One of the grandkids said something negative about his mommy. My son said that that was not nice. I agree.
Again I could go on and on. I believe things will fall into place.
Some of you are probably wondering why I am writing at this time of the night. You would think that it is because of the whole situation. That is not true. A little maybe but I have been having a health problem which keeps me awake. I usually catch up on my sleep later.
Again thank you everyone for being so caring. That is what I really love about this forum. You are my friends.
P.S. A big one I have to work on is being less judgemental of people.
Dragonfly