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Messages - Soozan

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General Discussion / Happy 2020
« on: December 28, 2019, 06:33:13 pm »
Hi Everybody! for those who are new here Rich and I met on this discussion board and got married in 2012! Lots of stuff going on ... kids going through college and university and moving out on their own .. was just thinking about when we met and wondered how everyone was doing?

Mood wise, I am reconnecting with outpatient CAMH for a look at my medications ... Rich and I also retired as of July 2019 and have been busy cleaning out his mom's house so when its time to move it will be easier. After going through 50 years of stuff it really hits home about how we need to downsize so we don't leave this kind of thing to our kids. 

How is everyone doing?

General Discussion / Can you believe its been 5 Years?!!!!???!!!
« on: June 25, 2017, 11:39:38 am »
Rich and I just got back from our yearly Niagara Vacation where we were celebrating our 5th Anniversary! Time goes fast when you are having fun I guess! Sorry we have not been on the site... Life with millennials is really challenging and time consuming! But all 3 kids are moving on as they should be with jobs and college etc. We are in the home stretch!

We just wanted to say HI and check in with everyone! We hope you are all doing well!

For those of you who don't know Rich and I, we met here on this forum and met offline, fell in love and were married 5 years ago! And we are still going strong! Many thought (especially Rich's pdoc!) we wouldn't make it because Rich is bipolar 2 and I am bipolar 1, but we are both committed to our mental health and taking medication, so life has been good together!

Best wishes to everyone and thank you MDAO and Paul M for this community board! My life would have been crap if it wasn't for this forum!

Happy 150th Canada Day!

Rich and Soozan

General Discussion / Wishing everyone a safe and happy holiday!
« on: December 23, 2015, 12:13:58 pm »
I know I haven't been on the board in a long while, I have been plagued with depression and having my meds adjusted and going to a program once a week, it has been a rough go but I think I am starting to feel better.

I am grateful the weather has been mild as I have severe anxiety when it comes to driving in the winter and we have to go to Brampton from Toronto on Christmas day and that is stressful enough....

I just wanted to take this opportunity to wish everyone a safe and happy holiday season! Hopefully 2016 will prove to be a good year!

- Soozan

General Discussion / Re: I am starting a program at CAMH
« on: October 23, 2015, 03:19:49 pm »
Hi Everyone, I know its been a while since I have posted, Started the program, got switched to Latuda from Abilify, still waiting to see if it makes a difference,

The CBT course I am taking was supposed to have 4 people in it which is a low number to begin with since it's group therapy, the first day t here was only 2 of us .... yesterday there was just me .... talk about the hot seat!

They keep referring to mood management, but being low all the time isn't exactly experiencing mania and deep depression, I guess I need to give it more time ... there is homework, filling out pages of various things ... I am doing my best to participate and do what is asked of me although right now I am seeing no point in all of it ... I guess that's because I am still down or flat....

I don't know how to get motivated and I am hoping between the new drugs and this, it will help me to get out of this funk and to participate in life more even though it's the last thing I want to do.

Time will tell

General Discussion / Re: I am starting a program at CAMH
« on: September 30, 2015, 09:44:03 pm »
Hi Paul! Thanks for your best wishes, sorry for not replying sooner, the last two weeks have been a flurry of appointments etc preparing me for the Thursday Group... it is a CBT group I have learned and will be a small group ... I hope it helps i have heard a lot of good things about cognitive therapy .... also my meds were changed to Latuda .... I took my first introductory dose today .... a lot of people say they have trouble the first 2 weeks on the stuff but for me ... so far so good :)

Anyway there is an update :) the group starts next thursday :) OH and we have also arranged to have my mother in law in the adult day program until 9pm that evening and all day, so I can attend the group  as well as have dinner with Rich downtown before going home.. with my mother in law having dementia, it is really hard for us to get out on our own .... so that is an added perk!

Take care!

General Discussion / Re: I am starting a program at CAMH
« on: September 14, 2015, 11:16:16 am »
Thanks Dragonfly, I am going today to see what's what :)

- Soozan

General Discussion / I am starting a program at CAMH
« on: September 11, 2015, 09:14:27 am »
In lieu of not  having a psychiatrist as of yet, I am starting a program with CAMH that involves 4 months of weekly group therapy and then 6 - 8 months of seeing someone once a month for follow up. I am wondering if anyone else has gone through this program? They change my medication and I am going on Monday to see a Nurse, clinician and the psychiatrist who recommended me .... I am not sure what this will hold but I am hopeful that it will help me get through my depression. It seems my meds that the last psychiatrist has put me on makes me depressed most of the time. I can't remember the last time I had a good laugh. Nothing appeals to me and I am becoming a shut in ...

I hope this will help. Anyone heard of this or participated in this program?

Just wondering what to expect.


General Discussion / Re: New here...
« on: July 17, 2015, 07:37:07 am »
Hi Kyas!

Welcome to the Forum! I am not on much but I wanted to welcome you and say glad you are here! This forum has been very helpful to me and I hpe you will find it helpful to you too! Everyone is very supportive!

- Soozan

General Discussion / Re: loved ones being scared of you
« on: July 17, 2015, 07:32:33 am »
Hi there! Sorry I have been off the board lately, been busy with work, but just came to visit and found this post, had to reply, ... I too have had people afraid of me but I think it is part and parcel of having the diagnosis... no matter what... goes on in our minds that we would never hurt anyone... the fact that we can be deemed "unstable" i think has a lot to do with it.

Grizzly, my heart goes out to you about not being able to get a kitten right away, I felt the anguish you had and its unfortunate that your fiance could not understand what you were going through. I am lucky that my husband is also bipolar and can relate to what I go through and lucky that we both stay medicated and equally lucky that usually we don't go through depressive times at the same time ... although ... I too am a cat lover but my hubby can't stand cats, so I will never be able to have a cat but we do have a dog, whom he tolerates, so I guess there always has to be compromise in any relationship. You said that was a year ago .. I hope you did finally get that kitten!

The label does have us at the mercy of preconceptions, as with anyone else with a disability and I guess that's what we have to live with and it sucks. it's hard when we can't have someone look into our heads and heart and be able to see what we are about. I don't get violent physically but my mouth still spews some pretty awful things when I get angry and I guess that makes anyone afraid of what actions are behind it ... I need to work on that ... even with the meds some things still break through .... damn meds can't solve everything I guess.

- Soozan

General Discussion / Re: Toronto Contingent
« on: June 25, 2015, 12:00:47 am »
Hi Grizzly! Rich and I are in Toronto! We are quite busy with our lives with 2 teens in post secondary school and a my mother in law has dimentia so we don't have much time to socialize but we do try to have get togethers off the board periodically when we can get everyone together ... lately its been few and far between... I know Paul M highly recommends the Support Group Gatherings! I myself have not gone as I don't get downtown that often but I can say that those who have gone have found them very helpful. I hope that this helps...

It's great to meet you!

Thanks Paul! It's good to know that there is something that one can do!

- Soozan

It would be nice just to "get a psychiatrist!!!" I went to a CAMH appointment only to find out that it was a "1 of" appointment to review my medications and that is it .... no help whatsoever to get me linked to a psychiatrist ... it just feels like there are so many psychiatrists at camh "studying psychiatry" when they could be practicing it .. it may not be true ... I am just very frustrated ... I want a psychiatrist downtown but it seems to get any kind of psychiatrist is hard.... I have to settle for anyone who is looking for patients and risk them being an idiot like I had before ... I guess I have a bad attitude ... but its frustrating .. very frustrating... to say the least

There is my rant for the day! :)

- Soozan

General Discussion / Re: getting a cat first one
« on: May 18, 2015, 11:02:31 pm »
He will probably hide for a few days but will come out ... the profile did say that he was reserved.... give it time Peter :)

He will come around :)

Good Luck!
- Soozan

General Discussion / Re: getting a cat first one
« on: May 17, 2015, 11:54:05 pm »
Congratulations Peter!

He is beautiful! I hope you enjoy each other a good long while. Good for you for getting an older cat, like you say, they are usually the last to be adopted!

- Soozan

General Discussion / Re: Introductions
« on: May 10, 2015, 10:33:17 pm »
Hi Becky!

Welcome to the Forum! Sorry no one has responded recently, we have all been pretty quiet lately! but usually we have more to say! Please make yourself at home and feel free to post whatever is on your mind. We would love to hear from you! and Happy Mother's day!

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