Author Topic: I need suggestions to an old problem  (Read 12116 times)

Stenacron man

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I need suggestions to an old problem
« on: January 31, 2017, 02:59:30 pm »
I need suggestions to an old problem

No matter how hard I try I just can’t do it. I backslide every time. Every time I get better I become complacent with my feeling solid, and positive from just rebuilding my mind or body from a crisis. I want to always walk, eat right, exercise. Once I feel good I stop doing the things that I know I need to keep doing.

Examples; it has now been 3 days since I brushed my teeth, I haven’t done my daily exercising in 4 days, I don’t know when I last had a shower, and the list goes one. You would think that after just about dying from suicide 2 times and damn near dying from lithium poisoning 3 time all in one year, that I might want to stay complacent with the things that just rebuild me and made me continue living.

I am horrible with structure I can create it but can’t follow it no matter what I have tried. They only time I will do everything is when my (OCPD) monster is satisfied. Example if I put everything I need to do together in one area and in the order they need to be used I do tend to use them daily. If I can't help but see them I will do them.

But because I live with others like my 80 year old mother who continually rearranges things and moves some of my stuff to another location because she now wants all this over there makes this hard . For the record I do not have a true bedroom. I sleep on foam from an old couch on the floor behind a large cabinet in the living room. 3 living in a 2 bedroom apartment. I love me little space but it is very tough to keep clean it's like 5 feet X 20 feet long.

I am going to try to make a list of things I have to do everyday + things that also need to get done and check them off as I go to see if it works.

If anybody has suggestions I am very open to any ideas.

Buddy Mack.