Author Topic: Online Support Groups  (Read 6866 times)

Dragonfly

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Re: Online Support Groups
« Reply #15 on: January 20, 2015, 07:47:47 PM »
Good going Peace! You must be so proud of yourself as all of us here are too.

Dragonfly :-*

Peace

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Re: Online Support Groups
« Reply #16 on: January 22, 2015, 06:41:27 AM »
Thanks Paul, Lou and Dragonfly! Your words of encouragement mean so much  :)

I was planning to walk two nights ago, but my husband asked me to watch a movie. It was This Is Where I Leave You and I recommend it. I walked on my own last night. I think the key is that as soon as it's dark outside I need to make the walk a priority.

I feel like a failure today. I want to buy a baby gift for my nephew. My daughter needs some clothes. Yesterday my husband said he'd drop my daughter and I off at a shopping mall to shop, then pick us up after he had the oil changed on the car. This morning I decided I couldn't do it because it's a large shopping mall. My daughter hates shopping and while very understanding towards me, isn't someone I can safely go someplace like shopping.  :-[

Dragonfly

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Re: Online Support Groups
« Reply #17 on: January 22, 2015, 08:48:53 AM »
Hi Peace,

I know what you mean about walking outside when it is dark out. I have done that often enough. I didn't want to meet my neighbours and talk to them. I would get too anxious. Peace like Paul said don't beat yourself up when you don't feel like walking. You can do it whenever you feel the time is right. If you feel like you should be doing this every night (don't know if that is what you are feeling) you will put pressure on yourself and not enjoy your walk and won't want to do it.

Do not feel like a failure Peace about not going shopping. I feel the most comfortable shopping with my oldest daughter. She understands that I  can't handle shopping too long. I get too tired. Then I get anxious.  My  daughter will take me home when I feel like this. My son is in his own little world most of the time. He doesn't see the signs when I can't shop anymore. I don't feel in control and again that is when I get anxious.

Bear with me. I feel like I am very wordy in my posts right now.

Thinking of you.

Dragonfly

paulm

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Re: Online Support Groups
« Reply #18 on: January 24, 2015, 02:06:09 AM »
Hello Peace. I can understand and sympathize with you.  I think that you were smart not to go shopping.  Generally my anxieties are under control these days, but I still have to be careful.

  The other day I had to go to the dentist, interview a potential volunteer for an organization I'm with, see my brother about a family issue,  do a little shopping and I thought while I'm in town I'll also get my vehicle e-tested.  I know all of those things can cause me a certain amount of stress, but when I laid out my schedule, I never thought anything about it. That was a mistake.

 Each item piled on a bit of stress and by the time I got to the e-testing place, my anxieties were starting to mount and the place was running 30 minutes behind schedule. I should have just cancelled my appointment when they said I would have to wait. Instead I started to overly worry about the vehicle not passing and if it failed what would it cost to repair it, where would I get the work done etc etc. (I've never had one fail and I had no reason to think that this one would fail, so my thoughts were irrational to start with).

 My heart started to pound, sweat started to roll off of me and I must have looked ill as when the tech guy finally came he asked if I was ok. Well the vehicle passed with no problems, but I had to take a break before I drove home and I was still shaking when I got there 45 minutes later.

 In reality, what had happened was that I already had, had a stressful day and I should have known (from past experiences) that I had too much going on that day and it would only take a little to trigger an anxiety attack.

 So you were smart not to go shopping and I was dumb in not cancelling something on a day where I knew my stress level was already too high.  I know I got a lot done that day, but once upon a time doing that much would have been easy for me. I have to realize that I have to live within my limits as they are now. That doesn't mean that I can't strive to do more, but allowing myself to get into uncomfortable positions only sets me back.

 So don't feel guilty about something that is too hard to do at this time. It doesn't matter whether it seems simple or not, if you are not up to it, you are not up to it.  You made the smart choice and cancelled. Take Care. paul m

LuckyLou

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Re: Online Support Groups
« Reply #19 on: January 24, 2015, 07:51:55 AM »
I agree with Paul and dragonfly u did the right thing for yourself so don't beat yourself up about it. I am learning my limits and sometimes taking a time out is the best thing to do for me. I am learning not to feel guilty about it. It's easier said then done I know!
Love is the reason!

Peace

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Re: Online Support Groups
« Reply #20 on: January 25, 2015, 10:30:15 AM »
Thanks Dragonfly, Paul and Lou  :)

It means so much to have words of encouragement and understanding from people who actually understand  :)

My sister took my daughter and I to the mall on Friday when she finished work. I'm certain I'd be doing so much better by now if I had more people like my sister I could go places with. My husband only tells me all the things I did wrong when I go out with him, and he's left me to find my own way home when I've told him I'm not able to do more than I'm able while we're out.

Success on the shopping trip! :) I purchased an adorable blanket with a matching ladybug, a Hello Kitty robe, and a baby's first Christmas ornament :) A little more than I wanted to spend, but I only sent a card when they got married, so I made up for it with the baby gift. I'm adding "great" to my titles now, it makes me feel so old.  :D We also found everything my daughter needed. It was an enjoyable outing.

LuckyLou

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Re: Online Support Groups
« Reply #21 on: January 25, 2015, 01:03:05 PM »
Good for u peace! Glad to hear it!
Love is the reason!