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Topics - jackal

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General Discussion / Coping with a new colleague
« on: March 06, 2018, 05:18:12 PM »
I recently was assigned a trainee at work to "ease my workload" (I'm a programmer) and it's been making my life miserable.

Up until recently, I've been doing well health wise, less depressed, no manic episodes, and then this comes along.

I understand that my boss is trying to make my life easier, but this guy is just about as unqualified as they get. Which means I'm constantly being interrupted to answer questions, and I'm having to fix mistakes that aren't mine.

By the end of the day, I find myself cranky, testy, drained and depressed. The worst part is that I actually like the work I do, or at least I did.

How to I keep myself from snapping, let alone get any work done?

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Depression and Bipolar / Getting past the nihilism
« on: March 20, 2017, 12:11:02 PM »
Hi everyone,

This will be my first post on this forum so I'd like to preemptively apologize for making it such a dark one.

I'm rather at my wits' end and have been for a while. This seems like the only place where I might come across people who actually understand what goes on in my head.

Having said that, I'll try and get to the point. Let me first say that I'm not presently in any sort of "crisis" so to speak. I'm not about to do anything dramatic or that I haven't thought through. Quite to the contrary, if anything, I think things through for far too long.

So in a nutshell, my question is how can one surmount the nihilism that often accompanies depression and bipolar disorder? In my particular situation, I've gotten to a point where the only lasting motivation to live is the prospect that dying would be horrible or even worse. That's pretty grim I realize, but I have put an incredible amount of thought into this.

How do I get out of this mindset? For context, I'm in my early 30's and I've been fighting depression my entire life, and was diagnosed bipolar while in university. I see a psychiatrist regularly and take my medication as prescribed. This only seems to help on the surface though. The conclusion I mentioned above isn't something that came to mind on a whim while in a manic state, rather it's the fruit of considerable analysis and thinking.

I'm sure there are at least some users of this forum that have found themselves in a similar situation. How have you gotten past it. Or have you gotten past it at all?

I'm really hoping someone can give me a new perspective on this.

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