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Messages - Amanda

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General Discussion / Re: Not doing well continued
« on: July 05, 2016, 11:08:58 PM »
 I would never think that I knew what it felt like to have diabetes or MS or Parkinson's syndrome, and I would certainly never imagine that I knew how best to treat those illnesses, so why would someone  ever think that they knew how it feels to have agoraphobia or how to manage it? It's disturbing that the people who are judging and labeling are the ones whose job it is supposed to be to help :( I am so sorry that you are having to go through all this! It is very wrong. "Face your fears" indeed!  If it was that simple doesn't she think you would have thought of it by now? Thinking of you and sending many good wishes!

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General Discussion / Re: Not doing well
« on: June 18, 2016, 07:57:19 AM »
Good for you for taking time to advocate for others when you are not well yourself!

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Family, Friends, and Supporters / Re: Anxiety Support Group Needed
« on: June 18, 2016, 07:52:41 AM »
The problem with Mood menders is that it is in the early afternoon.  I had this problem when I was referred for CBT too - there was a ten month waiting period for sessions that weren't in the middle of the day and even then they began at five.  Luckily I work close by and my workplace let me leave a few minutes early on Tuesdays. Apparently having mental health challenges and working traditional nine-to-five hours are not mutually compatible. 

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General Discussion / Re: Not doing well
« on: June 04, 2016, 07:47:51 PM »
Hi Peace.  I feel angry and resentful on your behalf. You were not treated respectfully. If there had been a meeting to discuss medical options because you were a cancer patient, you would have been treated with compassion and understanding. I am glad that you advocate yourself - that is what our community needs. I have OCD too and I know how challenging it is.

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General Discussion / Re: Feeling.....
« on: April 14, 2016, 08:58:48 PM »
I'm so glad to hear that you're feeling better! I was impressed by your problem-solving - who to talk to, who to go and see. You reminded me of how important it is to have a plan of action when moods overwhelm us. All the best to you!

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General Discussion / Re: How's everyone doing?
« on: March 20, 2016, 12:09:48 AM »
Misskris3 that sounds so hard:( You want to help and support this person but they are not able to receive and accept that at this time.  And still you worry about them. The non-reciprocal relationships feel so destructive.  I have too right now with a platonic friend. It is very hurtful to be ready to give so much of yourself and to receive so little back. I hope you are okay.

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General Discussion / Re: How's everyone doing?
« on: March 20, 2016, 12:01:01 AM »
Hi Peace.  I know you don't know me - I am new - but I am so sorry about the stress you are experiencing with your separation! My separation and divorce happened many years ago but I will never forget how painful it was. I am glad that you have people in your life who get it and can be there to support. It's very hard to go through.

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General Discussion / Re: How's everyone doing?
« on: March 19, 2016, 11:55:55 PM »
Hi Peter.  I know you don't know me - I'm new here - but I'm so sorry that you have been struggling with mild depression!  Sometimes I think that's almost the worst kind.  Disaster-type depression and we call for help.  But low-level live-with-it type depression and we go on living with it. I hope the brighter weather will help you feel better! Well done going to the gym!  Please pass along and share that dedication.

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General Discussion / Re: Problems with Anxiety
« on: March 17, 2016, 10:51:50 PM »
Thank you both so much for your replies!  It means so much to me that other people "get it". I get so confused by the mixed messages that seem to be everywhere right now.  You cannot listen to the radio or read a newspaper with hearing about programs for mental health, mental health awareness, fighting stigma and so on.  Where I work we devote an entire week every year to spreading awareness about mental health and the importance of tolerance and understanding.  Yet it seems to me that when I do open up and tell people that I have a mental illness and that it does sometimes cloud my perceptions or affect my feelings they really don't know what to do with that information.  They want to be kind and compassionate but they also wish I would stop talking about it.  I think it's a little like when someone accidentally has a loud public fart.  Everyone around them feels very sorry for them for embarrassing themselves and they politely pretend they didn't notice. Anyway, I do really appreciate your encouraging feedback! Paul, I envy you that say-it-like-it-is spouse!  I bet she really helps keep you level.  And Dragonfly I am sure that your grandchildren adore you and appreciate (without even knowing it) being taught right from wrong.  Your obvious love for them must be a warm hearth in their lives.

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General Discussion / Re: How's everyone doing?
« on: March 15, 2016, 03:22:54 PM »
Hi Dragonfly.  I am new to this group and just reading my way around.  I really enjoyed your story about your experience with your home (although I'm sorry you had to spend so much on a new furnace). It is really pleasant to hear about how a process that seems daunting and potentially unpleasant can be completely turned around by respectful, understanding people!  What an important connection you must have made, even if just for a short time.

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General Discussion / Re: Introductions
« on: March 15, 2016, 03:16:45 PM »
Hello:)  My name is Amanda.  I am a teacher and the divorced mother of three young adult daughters. I have bipolar disorder type 2 and OCD.  I go back and forth between doing just fine and really not doing fine (although I have not been in the true disaster zone for a few years since my medication was increased). I am glad to be on the group - I think it's a wonderful idea for people with mood disorders to support and encourage one another.

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General Discussion / Problems with Anxiety
« on: March 15, 2016, 02:47:32 PM »
I'm having a really bad time with social anxiety and delusional thinking. I am on a nice private Facebook group of friendly women, several of whom are friends. The focus is physical wellbeing and personal goal setting, with an emphasis on encouragement and mutual support. What could be nicer? But suddenly I became fixated on the idea that the group (and especially the group owner) did not want me on the group and wished I would leave. Every time I posted anything I was tormented by this image of people rolling their eyes and saying "oh no, there she is again". I also had very clear fantasies that the group administrators (including two friends) were talking together about the group members and especially agreeing that I am crazy and a negative presence on the group. In my anxiety I actually emailed the group leader and asked her if it was okay for me to be part of the group. Of course she was confused. I had been invited onto the group by a friend who is also a friend of hers. Afraid of damaging my relationships with people I left Facebook altogether for a while and just let my friends know by email that I was having a bit of bad health but would be back. I am trying to post on this group again (completely innocent posts congratulating people on reaching their exercise goals or wishing them well if they have a cold) but every time I do I feel sick with anxiety and am tortured by these ideas that they all think I am very disturbed and difficult and that they really dislike me. Rationally I know this doesn't make any sense. I can't even talk about it with my friends on the group because, although they know I have bipolar disorder and are sympathetic, they don't understand how I could think one thing and feel another and really not be able to make the two line up. Hoping that someone here understands! I don't want to walk away from a nice group of nice people - I need those in my life - but it's starting to occupy my every waking moment.

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General Discussion / Re: Need advice
« on: March 14, 2016, 11:28:53 PM »
Hi Peace.  My name is Amanda.  I haven't introduced myself because I can't quite figure out how - I'm new to the forum interface. I wanted to reply to you to say how very sorry I am that you are having to go through this!  I lived with an emotionally abusive husband for a long time before finally demanding that he leave and it was very destructive to me and my children.  I really hope you will find a way out of that situation as soon as possible.  Once a person has permitted themself to routinely disrespect another person they are unlikely to change.

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